Songs of Regret

Songs I listen to when I'm feeling particularly regretful and/or unhappy plus a poem I wrote about two years ago about eternity. Aren't you excited?

Ben Folds Five - Mess.



Matchbox 20 - Bed of Lies.

(I couldn't find a video for this one...)

http://popup.lala.com/popup/360569488118814094

Eternity:

I have no words to speak,


I have nothing to say.

There are no thoughts left to think,

That are worth thinking, anyway.



There are only memories,

There is only music and poetic lines..

There is only the motion,

Of time slipping through my mind.



It was nothing to me,

Yet somehow I've lost something.



Time is turning eternally,

And sometimes it's the only thing I can feel.

Now I only wish I could go back,

Restart, and say what is real.



Because now I know,

Eternity began several years ago.



Music is flowing eternally,

And sometimes it's the only thing I want to hear.

Now I only wish I could change the track,

Turn the record over and remember the fear.



Because now I see,

I could have stopped all these things.



Memories are always around,

But sometimes I can't remember if they're real.

I only wish I could see them as they were,

And remember why I wanted my future to be clear.



Because now I know,

That it wasn't worth the show.



I have no words to speak,

I have nothing to say.

There are no thoughts left to think,

That are worth thinking, anyway...



There are only memories,

There is only music and poetic lines.

There is only the motion,

Of time slipping through my mind...



It was nothing to me,

Yet somehow I've lost something.



I'm missing something that I never had.

Why do things always seem so bad?

I'm missing something that I never had.

Maybe I can still go back... back.

Burning Diamonds

These are some notes from a song idea I had a few months ago. It was the idea of Burning Diamonds.

"A cage of burning diamond, holding in the tortured soul.

Breaking it into a million pieces of stolen thoughts.

A life of twisted granite, crumbling at the touch of something whole.

Breaking into a million memories of shattered thoughts.

Can even this describe Hell? No.

Can anyone describe the memory of an emotion in your worst nightmare? Never.

So why do I keep trying?

Do I need to know what Death holds in store?

Why would one focus on eternal pain of death when they still have time left to grasp, however feebly, the memory of partial life?

I think burning diamonds would be the most incredible sight... and the most painful thing to try to grasp.

'Diamonds are much like people. Pressed and scorched into something beautiful. We are nothing until something powerful makes us something. Burning diamonds is the epitome of burning people. We are destroying ourselves. Something that was meant to be beautiful.' -R

In a way... we become diamonds by being forced to get closer to ourselves.

We're pushed inward and forced to look at our sins until we change.

Once we see properly, we've become clear like a diamond to ourselves.

And we modify.

Otherwise we're just lumps of black rock."

Burnside Music

Here is the link to my band's new Youtube page. There's only one video up so far, but hopefully more will be coming soon. The video is from a concert we recently performed at in Canby, OR.

Our name is Burnside.

I shall be posting some more musically-related sites, videos and pictures in the very near future.

... hopefully.

For Elijah (and an explanation)

First of all, I would like to say that in my post "feeling and thought, family and home" I didn't mean that I don't know my family at all. It's just that at times I wonder what family really is. That was the point of the post.

For Elijah:

Today you leave us,
Today your gone,
Today we must trust,
That you'll be fine.

We love you so much,
We'll miss you so much.

I wrote you a song,
It has no words,
No title to go along,
Except 'For Elijah.'

I love you so much,
I'll miss you so much.

It may seem sappy,
This whole poem and post,
But I hope it makes you happy,
We hope for that the most.

We hope you'll be happy,
We'll miss you so much.

I think the song is sad,
But I think it is beautiful,
I think you might get mad,
but still love it true and full.

I'm glad that your happy,
In your new home,
I'm glad you think this is sappy,
And you haven't changed your tone.

I'm glad that your happy,
I'll miss you anyway,
I love you my brother,
And I'll e-mail every day.

-Charity Tuuri

Hope is in the Light(Light is in the Snow)

Hello there, Do you hear
The sound of snowfall,
Muffled yet clear?

Oh, My dear, It takes years
To train your ears
To disapear.

*Hello my friend
Won't you sing again
About all the good times we had?
Oh, My friend
We'll just listen
To the sound
Of it coming down.
Like golden crowns
On a Glassy sea
For you
For me. *

_And if we come undone
We look at the brightness of the Sun
And see the light._

Please, I know it can be so hard
To believe, but believing gets you far.

Please, Why aren't you listening?
Everything, was made to sing to
I'll sing for you...

*Chorus*

_And now we've come undone
What happened to the Sun?
It's gone and.
The night is begun...
But the Sparkle of hope
Shines in that snow
Feel the flow
And just let go..._

Night time, coming in the form
Of a bad sign, the monster and the swarm

Darkness, will it ever end?
Dark Sin, why did we ever begin?

*Chorus*


_And now we're all undone
Where is our Sun?
Sparkles Hope
In the Snow
I let go
And the Light... flows._

Ah, peace.

Today I've written two new posts. Mabye I'm bored. But its nice to relax and just write. Its nice to not be unhappy. Its nice when your saying "Ah, peace." So now I will say it over again... but in the form of a poem that has just popped into my head.

Ah, Peace:

Ah, Peace.
Why do you come now?
Why not before?
Why were you so slow?
Ah, Peace.

It seems to be,
That peace is something not always found,
Peace is something to be held close now,
This seems to me.

Ah, Peace.
We welcome you,
With welcome arms,
Ah, Peace.

The world lies on your shoulders,
You hold it up so easily,
Sometimes its nothing on your shoulders,
But you let it fall anyway.

You let it crash down on us,
You leave for only God knows what,
You let us hold it up ourselves,
And mabye learn what's in ourselves.

And I think I have learned,
Why I'm here, why I'm there,
Perhaps you left for something good,
But please, don't disapear.

Please don't leave us all alone,
Don't leave us in our empty homes,
We have nothing left but strife,
Pulling us apart, cutting with knives,

Ah, Peace.
Why so slow to return?
Ah, Peace.
You let our minds burn,

With pain, with anger,
With useless strife,
Why can't we fight,
For something worthwhile,

For something true,
Something good,
Something pure,
Like our Saviour would?

But at last you've returned,
For your shoulders we have yearned,
To lean on, to rest, to sleep,
Ah... Peace.